Do you like everyone you’ve ever met? I bet you don’t. Do you choose to engage with people you don’t like in real life? I bet you try not to. So why do we follow people who we don’t like? Why is Social Media so different? What stops people from hitting that Unfollow button?
There’s a lot of talk in the blogosphere these days about supporting each other and female empowerment … give me a break! I was always taught that respect is something that you earn and I agree. Just because we have a blog, an Instagram, a god damn vagina, it doesn’t mean that we all have to like each other.
We all have people who don’t like us and that is perfectly fine – we can’t be everyone’s cup of Tetley. You can have people who have followed you for years who suddenly unfollow. I lost so many when I wrote that Dupes post and I’m glad. I don’t want people to follow me who don’t like me. If people’s opinions on you change, then so be it. These people aren’t your friends, your family so who cares what they think?
I don’t tend to be one of those who initiates a following – I’m more of a follow back girl but I don’t hesitate to unfollow. If someone tweets something I don’t agree with then fine, but if they consistently do so … girl bye! If people who have been friendly towards me for a while (usually when I’m running a giveaway) unfollow, do I cry about it? No I don’t. I don’t need validation from people I don’t even know and I think more people need to remember that.
I try really hard in life not to be two faced. I have a reputation of being a bitch, but I think some people mistake honesty for bitchiness. I understand that in this industry that who you know can be important, but it’s not everything. Should I follow someone I really don’t like just because other people do? I can’t be like that.
When the whole ‘bot’ business blew up, I unfollowed people I considered to be blogging friends. I really didn’t agree with what they were doing or the direction they were starting to take. I had my eyes opened to people I had liked and I removed myself from them. I can’t be false and engage with people who I have no respect for. Does that make me a bitch?
I really think that at times we care too much about who likes us. Does it make us a better blogger if we have lots of blogger friends? Does it mean I can write a better review or take a nicer photo? No it doesn’t. Is it nice to have people to chat to and gossip to? Yes it is, but when you lose respect for that person, why continue?
I want to build genuine relationships with people who I actually like. I don’t need people in my life who have no respect for me and I don’t need to be in their lives either. This can be a very difficult industry to be in and it can be very competitive. You can make some really nice friendships through blogging and I like that side of it. I don’t like the false friendships though.
I actually have far more respect for the people who openly admit they dislike me than I do for the ones who blow smoke up my arse. If you think I’m a dick, then just don’t interact with me, same as I won’t with you. It’s quite simple.
However, opinions can also change. I now have quite a lot of time for someone who I have publicly slated in the past – I actually like her now and see why others do. I’m not saying that you can’t change how you feel about someone. Sometimes I can be too quick to judge people and I’m not ashamed to admit that. At the same time I can be too quick to like someone and that can really bite you on the booty.
I suppose what I’m trying to say in this little ramble of mine, is that you don’t have to like everyone. You don’t have to follow people who you don’t like. If you think someone is a shitty person, remove them from your feed. Surround yourself with people you do like.
This probably all makes much more sense in my head than in words, but I feel quite strongly about this. Life can be crappy enough as it is, so why fill it with people you can’t stand? Fill it with people who make you laugh, who you can talk to about anything …. fill it with people you’d choose to spend time with in the real World.